Friends and Relatives are so thoughtful and kind ...they try to say the right thing and even stick out their neck and lend a hand even for the most controversial job ie offering to be a surrogate and carry YOUR baby. At first this may seem to be manna from Heaven! Someone has stepped up to the plate and recognized that there is a problem here and they are going to act as savior and 'make it all OKAY'. Better yet they may 'want nothing' as far as compensation (money) but they MAY want a baby named after them! Someone sent me some great insight as to what went through their mind when a casual friend of the family offered to be their surrogate:
" I'm uncomfortable.... she seems to think this is her purpose in life, she wants very badly to do this for us and I'm afraid that I'll have to spend the rest of my life being… overly grateful. And since we have common friends and our moms are friends, how long before I get labeled as an ingrate? Since we talk about once every 3 months now, I think she will expect that will change to daily/weekly forever & if it doesn’t then there will be problems. And I don’t want her second guessing every parenting decision we make for the rest of our lives. Other comments that gave me pause were 1. “If I have triplets you’re going to have to name one of them after me.” And 2. “What happens after delivery? You just take the baby and leave?” (uhm, yes, because it’s mine, not yours.)"